Thinking

Thoughts

‘Unhelpful thoughts that are not True’.

This was my response to a question posed inside a LinkedIn group asking: ‘What’s standing in the way between you and the person you most want to be?’

I’ve realised over my young years that unhelpful thoughts get me into all sorts of trouble with myself. Usually there’s nobody else involved it’s all my own doing. It stops me from moving forward, it stops me from staying in the moment, I overthink stuff and arrive at conclusions that are never reality.

Where does this come from?
How does this manifest?
How can I change it?

It’s as a consequence of years of self-programming that we do to ourselves, repeated thoughts that are not true become truths in your own reality. The more you think of something the more it gets hard-wired in our neural pathways. Tony Robbins has an acronym for it, NAC, Neuro-associative conditioning.

Buddha Statue Black — Michael de Groot

There is also another famous saying, which sums up what happens in your brain when you continuously think the same untruths.

Imagine each thought is a neuron, maybe a new one or likely an old one, because you’ve been thinking this stuff for a while. So when you think that thought a neuron fires with another neuron that then concludes it is the truth. Very likely it’s not, but you’ve just created that connection. Repeat the same thought over and over and those neurons fire over and over too.

‘Neurons that fire together wire together’.

Once wired together it’s very hard to get them apart. The same process that wired them together needs to commence to unwire them. So repeated thoughts of the opposite of the untruth are needed in order to lose the wired connection and create a new neural pathway instead. For example, the untruth of ‘I won’t amount to anything’ could be replaced with ‘I am perfect as I am in this very moment’. Repeat that thought over and over and eventually the other one will one day stop appearing in your thoughts. It sounds great in theory doesn’t it? Doing it is a much harder thing.

Happy thinking!

Michael de Groot

Happiness

Happiness is almost always conditional. How many times have you uttered the sentence in your head ‘I’ll be happy when…’.

You’ll remember the following thoughts that flow through your head on a constant and never-ending basis.

- when I have enough money
- when my parents leave me alone
- when I get the right job
- when my partner stops doing annoying stuff
- when I am my ideal weight
- when my boss stops hassling me
- when my neighbours move away
- when my ex stops controlling me
- when I have the right house/apartment
- when they stop bullying me on social media

And many more variations and examples, which I am sure you can think of.

These constant and never-ending thoughts will guarantee to never make you happy, ever.

A better thought process is to think about the things that already exist in your life that you can be grateful for. A much harder thought process to adopt, because we’re so programmed with those negative thoughts that we’ve hardly got any space to replace those thoughts.

Every habit starts with a tiny little step. I love Leo Babauta a mindfulness blogger who has perfectly captured the art of changing habits in his blog, ebooks and books. You can find his details via:

[embed]https://zenhabits.net[/embed]

Happy thinking!

Michael de Groot