Reflections

Yours

The only work we ever need to do on this planet is the work on ourselves. However most of us find it easier to focus on others and see what’s wrong with them. We judge them, we get angry with them, we’re jealous of them and sometimes we just want to be like them. We don’t always see the best in others do we?

What if, what you see in others, you realised those traits were merely a reflection of you? Your own failings expressed in others, of course you won’t like what you see. It’s tough to see yourself in others. Might it be that you’re not perfect either? That you have some failings too? Some stuff you need to work on, get better at, be more forgiving of yourself and others, develop better habits, have more compassion?

This is tougher then we realise. Yes we need to start from a place that says we’re not broken and if we start from that place then the others aren’t broken either. If you can start from that place everything else becomes just easier. Because if you stop spending time focussing on others and just on yourself, what else can you learn about you, about your habits, your decisions, your micro-decisions, your thoughts and your addictions?

If we could just work on ourselves and become the best we can be for ourselves, not for anyone else, just for ourselves then we could actually become a more compassionate individual seeing the best in everyone around us, including some of the worst people walking the planet. We all have a dark side, it may not have been expressed in hideous crimes or actions but it will have been expressed in some way towards someone, maybe even someone you love.

Time to go within, time to spend time looking in the mirror before looking at others.

Happy yours!

Michael de Groot

Decision

I recently interviewed Harun Rabbani on my Share Your Story Podcast. In fact I interviewed him twice as we ran out of time on the first episode. The second episode allowed us to go into a lot of depth on his expert topic, ‘decision making’.

I highly recommend a listen. Harun explained in intimate detail what it takes to become more conscious in making your decisions. I loved his insights. All of us look back at decisions we’ve taken and usually with some regret or doubt. Doubt whether we’ve actually made the right decisions in our lives. We also know without a shadow of doubt some of the decisions that have landed us into trouble, whether it be with our family, our work colleagues and our spouses and children.

It’s not easy to make the right decisions and as Harun explains decisions are just like any muscle in the body. If you wish to grow a muscle you have to exercise it. If you want to make better decisions and know that they are the right ones, you have to exercise that process too.

Harun explains many different options to improve the art of decision making and one of those is journalling.

I had never heard of this previously, so I am delighted that I learnt this from Harun. I started the same day.

The premise is very simple. At the end of each day, reflect on the decisions you have taken in the day. Identify one major one that deserves being recorded in your journal. Write why you took that decision and how it made you feel. I have to say having started this just a few days ago, it’s making me feel much better about my decisions already and I feel in such a short time more confident about the decisions I will take in the future.

One of the better side-effects of reflecting on your decisions is that you will slow down a little before making decisions, you start becoming a conscious decision maker.

Happy decision making!

Michael de Groot